Saturday, October 23, 2010

Rule 11: BE ALOOF.

I just downed a fried egg cheeseburger. I'm feeling especially manly right now.

Rule 11: BE ALOOF.

"Aloof" is seriously one of my favorite words. Not only is it hilarious to say out loud (especially in various accents), it is almost guaranteed to get you the girl.

Some fancy-pants phrase-coiner (probably Shakespeare) once said that "Absence makes the heart grow fonder." For those who don't believe in any language other than Amer'can, this loosely translates to: "How can I miss you if you don't go away?"

Here's the thing: human beings like attention. Some even constantly NEED attention (i.e.: babies). There's a good chance that most people would rather have attention than food, because attention is just a few levels away from LOOOVE. This is why kids who get picked on at school will keep trying to hang out with those that pick on him: negative attention is better than no attention at all.

So it makes perfect sense that when one of us peoples does not receive attention when we feel we
completely deserve it, we will slowly start to freak out. We will even change the circumstances within our environment more and more until that attention is bestowed upon us.

THEREFORE, if you (a guy) are interested in a female (a girl) and want her to be interested in you back, you need to NOT talk to her.

That's right, punk. See, YOUR tendency will be to try to spend every waking moment with this girl, because hey,
you really like her. I understand where you're coming from, but this plan will totally backfire on you. You will smother her. Instead, take this approach: Introduce yourself, be charming and friendly, then make yourself SPARSE. You want to be like a magical creature that randomly graces her with your presence. But less gay-sounding.

This is especially the case once you get her to go on a date with you. I have it on good authority from one of my favorite lady-friends that The Three Day Rule for calling women is absolutely true: "A woman's interest for a guy lasts exactly 72 hours. She'll be
dying for you to call her right up until that point, but after that, she'll be completely over you."

I know this seems like a form of abuse or neglect, but as previously mentioned in the
3rd Natural Law, and as will be mentioned in a future case study, most women like to be mistreated. And besides, we ALL want that which we can't have.

This scenario gets more precarious the hotter the girl is. She's more likely to get more infuriated when you don't give her enough attention, but she's
also more likely to move on quicker. As in all things, it's important to find a balance. I trust you'll be able to figure this out for yourselves.


  1. "But less gay-sounding." I love that.

  2. This is entirely true, I have experienced this many times and sadly, it works.

  3. My god... as a man who has gotten himself into a mess of a "relationship" and only started figuring some of this shit out by accident I can say that you guys do actually know what you're talking about.

    I also asked another girl if every girl is as crazy as my "friend" and she said, "No." I have a sneaking suspicion she may have been lying to me.

  4. that is a crock of shit!!!! but sadly has worked on many females sad to say...i on the other hand u dont show the true self with me and play that stupid dick game then we can call it DONE... We shoule not have to play that game...of cat and mouse I dont have the time nor the patience for all or dont call I will move on...peace

  5. my gal wants me to be aloof, to help rekindle passion. too long and complicated story to tell. I'll try it.

  6. Yep, always works, just go to a coffeeshop, read a book, don't take eyes off the book. First woman interrupts, she is flirting, especially if it is a funny book.
    But keep your eyes mostly on the book.
    Women, reverse is true, also.
    Read a book, how are they going to break the ice, get your attention while your reading that book, (they will figure it out) wink, wink.

  7. Dating a really hot Italian gal...long distance relationship, 4 hours away. Could be possibilities for a long, maybe permanent run for us. Things are going great for us so far, long trips together, days at her house, Christmas weekend at the Biltmore House in Ashville NC, etc. She is away for a month to visit her son in Australia. So here it is...I want to take all of this to a different level. Set the trajectory of our relationship on a path to the stars. When we first met I would call here and there, act a little interested, then back away. Then ask her to a very romantic get away, then cool things. It absolutely would drive her nuts! No, I wasn't cruel, just cool. This really pushed her buttons, she still brings it up. Fast forward to now...I am waiting on a call from her from Australia after break in communication for 3 days, she was camping in the outback with her son. My I grab the phone on the first ring or just listen to it ring? Pick up the phone the next time it rings. Or call her back when I can? After reading this blog I can see I need to be cool again. Let her stew a bit over why I was not waiting like a puppy dog for her to call. If I am really going to "get" this gal now is the time again to be a little unavailable. In my heart I know this will do the here I go!